Every time we do something new or big at Red School, the heat is turned up. For example, we’re holding space for this year's group of Menstruality Leaders right now, and we are being rightly and brilliantly stretched by their questions, curiosity and passion.
The pace of our work has picked up, life is asking more of us of both, and I (Sjanie) am feeling that familiar stretch of being moved outside of my comfort zone—resources stretched and responsibilities big. The stretch reminds me of birthing my children, and how much courage, tenacity and surrender it took to move them through the birth canal as the enormous pressure of contraction and expansion ensued. I imagine you can relate through your own threshold crossing moments.
As ever, I’m leaning hard on my cycle awareness practice, and today I want to tease out some of the specific ways it helps me to step up to say yes to my calling, in a sustainable way.
Cycle Awareness Gives us Context
I’m being held and guided by the process of expansion and contraction, of death and rebirth, that happens every cycle month as we build up to ovulation, then wind down to menstruation. It is reminding me that whenever I feel out of my depth and my stress personality kicks in, I’m actually on the brink of expansion. Which helps me stay close to myself, take my own side and manage all the vulnerability that can come with saying yes to our Callings (as well as the inner critic who loves to jump in at the first whiff of vulnerability!).
Leaning back into Restedness
When life is asking more of me, rather than trying to do more, override myself, or push through, my cycle has taught me to rest back into myself. This stretch peaks every cycle month in the void time before I bleed. If I can catch myself before I spin off into the next drama, I can feel that I’m held by a force that’s bigger than me - by the love I spoke about at the start of this email - and by my calling. I also experienced this in the final stages of labour, when, in the face of the huge intensity (and seeming impossibility!), I was able to surrender into a power that was much bigger than me.
In every day terms, this means I double-down on purposeful self care. Cycle Awareness plugs me right into what it is I am needing each day. How I tend to that will look different each day—If I’ve got five minutes I’ll pause and connect with my body, if I’ve got ten minutes I’m out on the grass outside doing a forward bend. I move more, I take more pauses (and even take a short lie down!)I eat foods that nourish me, and I maintain a disciplined holding of myself to ensure I’m tending to my nervous system, so that I’m as resourced as I can be to meet the challenge without being taken down by it. It’s what makes my work sustainable.
The Art of Cyclical Restraint
I feel so alive and passionate about my vision for the world, and it is big. We really want to change the way the world understands the menstrual cycle and menopause. But I’m also just a human being, with only so much time. And I’m a mother of two beautiful daughters. When my human limitations frustrate me, I remember cyclical wisdom. Each inner season of our menstrual cycle shows us our limits and keeps us contained within its rhythmic holding. Honouring and accepting my limits creates a kind of potency and power beyond what my human self is seemingly capable of. When I work with the art of restraint, I embrace my limits rather than trying to overcome them, and the result is a potent fierceness of focus, that unleashes creative power.
By honouring the wisdom of each of our inner seasons, and especially by embracing rest and surrender at menstruation we access an immense inner creativity and strength. In this way, our cycles can serve as a touchstone to keep coming back to, or a rooting in that help us to continue branching out.
If you’d like to get to know your strengths and vulnerabilities and how to work with the limits of your cycle so you can step up in your life without burning out, please come and explore our Cycle Power course here.
